雅思笔试写作真题外教范文 文化传统商业化的优劣势(含音频)

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你好呀,我是来自加拿大的雅思外教Mac。今天,给大家带来一个IELTS雅思大作文的原创范文。老规矩,以下是正文目录:

1,题目

2,审题

3,高分范文

4,范文朗读

5,范文地道词汇中英对照,包括:

  • 题目改述
  • 讨论+观点类大作文高分句型
  • 展示“词汇丰富度”的词汇&短语
  • 展示“连贯与衔接”的词汇&句型

雅思笔试写作真题外教范文  文化传统商业化的优劣势(含音频)插图

题目:

Some people think that cultural traditions will be destroyed when they are used as money-making machines aimed at tourists. Others believe it is the only way to save such traditions in the world today. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.

审题:

  • Type: Discuss & Opinion 讨论+观点 (我的观点:agree: making money is a good way, but not the only way)
  • Body 1: profiting from culture cheapens it and will cause its disappearance
  • Body 2: locals will preserve their culture because it makes money/education of young is better
  • Key words: will be destroyed / only way

雅思笔试写作真题外教范文  文化传统商业化的优劣势(含音频)插图(1)

- Model Answer 高分范文 & 范文朗读 -

范文音频戳这里

It is believed by some that the commercialization of cultural elements geared towards tourism will cause their destruction, whereas others feel this is the sole method to help with their protection. This essay shall explore both views; however, in my opinion, I believe this type of profiteering will result in ensuring their survival rather than their ruin, though I also think that this method is not exclusive.

One of the main reasons why some feel the commercialization of cultural heritage may eventually lead to the vanishment of traditions is that locals will be seduced by the idea of making a profit, no matter how that money is made. As such, traditional elements, such as ethnic singing and dancing activities, will eventually become hollow and shallow, and as a consequence, tourism will gradually die off, with the final result of extinguishing these traditions. The same could be stated for physical buildings, whereby old buildings have been demolished simply to be replaced by replicas focused towards tourists. This use of cultural elements for commercial ends, consequently, runs the risk of ensuring their demise.

Many regions, however, seek to make a living through showcasing their unique traditions to outsiders, causing local citizens of that area to have a vested interest in the continuation of their traditional culture, and in turn, helping to safeguard the survival not just of the traditions but also their livelihoods. Ethnic minorities, for example, continue to survive with their traditions intact, as it is the commercial promotion of their unique cultural identity that attracts onlookers and tourists. Nevertheless, the least intrusive method to preserve cultural traditions while simultaneously maintaining their integrity is by infusing the school curriculum with courses that promote cultural traditions, particularly as the modern world allows for all students to use the Internet to easily engage with culture.

In conclusion, though both arguments are indeed valid, I think that through the promotion of culture in school courses, the customs and traditions of a region will be maintained with greater purity than simply through selling cultural artifacts to tourists.

雅思笔试写作真题外教范文  文化传统商业化的优劣势(含音频)插图(2)

- Essay Analysis 范文解析 -

- (1) Introduction

Paraphrasing from the Statement/Question 题目改述:

  • Some people think that = it is believed by some that
  • cultural traditions = cultural elements
  • will be destroyed = cause their destruction
  • used as money-making machines = the commercialization of
  • aimed at = geared towards
  • tourists = tourism

Standard Phrase for the “Discuss + Opinion” type essay 讨论+观点类大作文高分句型:

  • It is believed by some that
  • , whereas others feel
  • This essay shall explore both views; however, in my opinion, I believe
  • , though I also think that

Words showing Cohesion (C&C) 展示“连贯与衔接”的词汇和短语:

  • their
  • , whereas
  • This
  • will result in
  • rather than
  • , though
  • also

Vocabulary 高分地道词汇和短语:

  • commercialization 商业化
  • cultural elements 文化元素
  • geared towards 面向;着眼于
  • profiteering 谋取利益
  • ensuring 确保
  • survival 生存
  • ruin 毁灭
  • exclusive 独有的;排他的

- (2) Body 1 -

Aspects that must be referred to 这段需要提到:

  • profiting from culture cheapens it and will cause its disappearance

Standard IELTS essay phrase 雅思高频句型:

  • One of the main reasons why some feel…is that

Vocabulary and Collocations 高分地道词汇和短语

  • cultural heritage 文化遗产;文化传承
  • vanishment 消失
  • seduced 引诱
  • traditional elements 传统元素
  • ethnic 具有民族特色的
  • hollow 空心的
  • shallow 肤浅的
  • die off 绝迹
  • extinguishing 消灭
  • demolished 破坏;毁坏
  • replicas 复制品
  • commercial ends 商业目的
  • runs the risk of 面临……的风险
  • demise 死亡

Words Showing Cohesion [Signposting words, conjunctions, relative pronouns] (C&C) 展示“连贯与衔接”的词汇和短语:

  • lead to
  • is that
  • by the idea of
  • , no matter how that
  • As such,
  • , such as
  • will eventually become
  • , and as a consequence
  • , with the final result of
  • these
  • The same could be stated for
  • , whereby
  • simply
  • This
  • , consequently,

- (3) Body 2 -

Aspects that must be referred to 这段需要提到:

  • locals
    雅思笔试写作真题外教范文  文化传统商业化的优劣势(含音频)插图(3)
    will preserve their culture because it makes money/education of young is better

Standard IELTS essay phrase 雅思高频句型:

  • …, however, …

Vocabulary and Collocations 高分地道词汇和短语:

  • make a living 谋生
  • showcasing 展示
  • unique 独特的
  • outsiders 外来者
  • vested interest in 既得利益
  • the continuation of 继续
  • safeguard 保护
  • livelihoods 生计
  • ethnic minorities 少数民族
  • intact 完好无损的
  • the commercial promotion of 商业推广
  • cultural identity 文化身份
  • onlookers 观众
  • intrusive 侵扰的
  • integrity 完整
  • infusing 注入
  • school curriculum 学校课程表
  • engage with 与……交流

Words Showing Cohesion [Signposting words, conjunctions, relative pronouns] (C&C) 展示“连贯与衔接”的词汇和短语:

  • , however,
  • their
  • , causing
  • , and in turn,
  • , helping to
  • not just of…but also their
  • , for example,
  • , as
  • Nevertheless,
  • the least
  • while simultaneously
  • , particularly as
  • allows for


雅思笔试写作真题外教范文  文化传统商业化的优劣势(含音频)插图(4)
- (4) Conclusion -

Standard IELTS essay phrase 雅思高频句型:

  • In conclusion,
  • , I think that

Vocabulary and Collocations 高分地道词汇和短语:

  • valid 合理的;复合逻辑的
  • purity 纯洁
  • artifacts 人工制品

Words Showing Cohesion [Signposting words, conjunctions, relative pronouns] (C&C) 展示“连贯与衔接”的词汇和短语:

  • though both
  • indeed
  • through
  • than
  • simply

雅思笔试写作真题外教范文  文化传统商业化的优劣势(含音频)插图(5)

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祝各位早日和雅思分手,加油!

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