- A+
51. 假设你是红星中学高三学生李华。你们学校英语戏剧俱乐部外籍指导教师Jim因疫情滞留英国。复学在即,作为俱乐部负责人,你给Jim写一封电子邮件,请他推荐一名外籍指导教师,内容包括:
1. 条件及要求;
2. 表示感谢并提醒注意防护。
注意:1. 词数不少于
50;
2. 开头和结尾已给出,不计入总词数。
Dear Jim,
________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Yours,
Li Hua
【答案】
Dear Jim,
How are you doing? I hope everything's OK with you.
Our school's drama club plans to start practising. Since you're away in Britain, we need a drama teacher to be in your place. Would you please recommend one for us? He or she should be a native English speaker, currently in Beijing, and experienced in both directing and teaching.
Thank you for your help. Please take care of yourself. Remember to wear a mask when necessary.
Yours,
Li Hua
【解析】
本篇书面表达是应用文,要求写一封书信。
【详解】第1步:根据提示可知,假设你是红星中学高三学生李华。你们学校英语戏剧俱乐部外籍指导教师Jim因疫情滞留英国。复学在即,作为俱乐部负责人,你给Jim写一封电子邮件,请他推荐一名外籍指导教师,内容包括:1. 条件及要求;2. 表示感谢并提醒注意防护。
第2步:根据写作要求,确定关键词(组):drama club (戏剧俱乐部);plan to do sth.(计划做某事);in one's place(代替某人);recommend(推荐);a native English speaker(以英语为母语的人);currently (目前);experienced(熟练的);both…and…(两者都……);take care of(照顾);wear a mask(戴口罩)等。
第3步:根据提示及关键词(组)进行遣词造句,注意主谓一致和时态问题。此处文章主要应用一般现在时。
第4步:连句成文,注意使用恰当的连词进行句子之间的衔接与过渡,书写一定要规范清晰,保持整洁美观的卷面是非常重要的。
【点睛】范文内容完整,语言规范,语篇连贯,词数适当。作者在范文中使用了较多高级表达方式,如Since you're away in Britain, we need a drama teacher to be in your place.运用原因状语从句。全文中没有中国式英语的句式,显示了很高的驾驭英语的能力。另外文章思路清晰、层次分明,上下句转换自然,为文章增色添彩。
第二节(20分)
52. 假设你是红星中学高三(1)班班长李华。居家学习期间,你们班开展了一次以“自律”为主题的调研活动。请根据以下四幅图的先后顺序,写一篇英文稿件,给你们学校英文网站投稿,记述你在本次活动中发现问题并解决问题的过程。
注意:词数不少于60。
提示词:自律 self-discipline
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
【答案】One possible version:
While studying at home, I surveyed my class on “self-discipline”. The findings worried me a lot.
To solve the problem, I asked my parents for help, and they offered some practical advice. Then I held an online discussion with my classmates on how to well discipline ourselves. After that, we all knew better what to do.
Three months later I did a second survey, which showed great improvements in self-discipline. I phoned my teacher about it, and we both felt very pleased.
【解析】
【分析】
本篇书面表达属于应用文。这是一篇图画作文,要求考生按以下四幅图的先后顺序,就你开展“自律”调研活动中发现问题并解决问题的过程写一篇英文稿件,向学校英文网站投稿。
【详解】第一步:审题
体裁:应用文
时态:根据提示,时态应为一般过去时
人称:第一人称为主
结构:总分法
总分法指把主题句作为总说,把支持句作为分说,并以这种方式安排所写内容。
要求:1. 表明写作主题——“自律”
2. 根据图片描写事件过程:
第一幅图片描写自己对“自律”调研结果很担忧;
第二幅图片描写自己向父母求助解决方法/建议;
第三幅图片描写自己和同学们在网上讨论如何自律;
第四幅图片描写三个月后,大家自律能力有了很大提高,我和老师很高兴。
第二步:列提纲 (重点词组)
ask sb. for help;practical advice;an online discussion;do a second survey
第三步:连词成句
1. I asked my parents for help and they offered some practical advice.
2. Then I held an online discussion with my classmates on how to well discipline ourselves.
3. I did a second survey, which showed great improvements in self-discipline.
(根据提示及关键词(组)进行遣词造句,注意主谓一致和时态问题。)
第四步:连句成篇(衔接词)
1.表文章结构顺序:First of all, Firstly/First, Secondly/Second… And then, Finally, In the end, At last, Last but not least
2.表并列补充关系:What is more, Besides, Moreover, Furthermore, In addition, As well as, not only…but (also), including,
also
3.表转折对比关系:However, On the contrary, but, Although + clause (从句), In spite of + n/doing, On the one hand…,On the other hand… Some…,while others…,as for, so…that…
4.表因果关系:Because, As, So, Thus, Therefore, As a result
5表换一种方式表达:In other words, that is to say,
6.表进行举例说明:For example; For instance; such as + n/doing
7.表陈述事实:In fact, frankly speaking
8.表选择:either…or…,or
连句成文,注意使用恰当的连词进行句子之间的衔接与过渡,书写一定要规范清晰。
第五步:润色修改
【点睛】范文内容完整,结构严谨,要点全面,语言规范,语篇连贯,词数适当,上下文意思连贯,符合逻辑关系。作者在范文中使用了主从复合句,如which showed great improvements in self-discipline这句话中用了which引导的非限制性定语从句;使用了非常好的短语,如ask sb. for help,an online discussion,do a second survey等,为文章增色不少。全文中没有中国式英语的句式,显示了很高的驾驭英语的能力。另外,文章思路清晰、层次分明,上下句转换自然,为文章增色添彩。